The Undesireables

by Whiskers, the exasperated matron of mischief.

Just so's you know, right up front, I'm one ticked-off kitty.  Yes, I am.   No, I didn't remove a tick from my furry body. I don't have ticks, fleas or any other parasites. Cheeky readers, to even think that!

I'm annoyed because the old girl is unwell AGAIN... and 'we' are back on nursing duties.  Can you believe it?  You might as well... 'cause it's true.  

Sweetie and Gentle Mousie have donned their nursing caps and gear and gone into overdrive.  Honey and lemon in her Wild Sweet Orange tea for the sore throat, inhaled steroids for the lungs (for Grammy, not them) and another steroid for the sinuses.  Tucked in a blanket with heating pad.  This is getting old, Grammy! Really old!  

So, what does that do to us?  Well, besides having to manage the old girl, it puts a major damper on the mischief side of life.  Yes, it does!  How can we create mayhem with a pair of brown-speckled blue eyes staring at us?  EXACTLY!  We cannot!  And that ticks me off because that's what I am all about and what I had planned for this week.  

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So, what to do from here... Well, let's see.   Maybe we'll dose her up on her meds, wrap her in bubblewrap and ship her off to some obscure place with no return address on the package.  Yes, I think that sounds like a plan.  

What was that, Sweetie? *Groan, moan, mumble, splutter*  Well, it seems the nurses have spoken.  I'm not shipping her off to some unknown destination. Such party poopers.  Nothing like putting a damper on life.  I tell you though, when they speak, we listen... Look at those faces! They are not to be trifled with.  *grumble, mutter, whine*  

What to do with the old girl?   Anyone have suggestions?  

Well, if we cannot ship her off into oblivion or some such place the boys and I, Whiskers the mischief matron, will make ourselves scarce.   

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'But, before I leave... just a little quick update.  You remember that ant issue we discussed and had taken care of... Well..... Grammy thought they were back and freaked... maybe that's what triggered her 'whatever-she-has'!   

Saturday after her delightful afternoon with Aunty L she treated herself to a manicure and Mrs L, the manicurist, gave the old girl some herbs from her garden.  Grammy loves fresh herbs and this was oregano freshly picked.  While Grammy cannot smell it she remembers how she loved it and imagined how delicious it would be in her cooking, brought it home, took it out of the baggie and placed it in water to crisp up until she used it.  

Because we are destructive little creatures with plants Grammy set the oregano in it's jar of water on the balcony to use in a day or two, returned to the kitchen and an ANT was crawling around on the countertop.  FREAK OUT!!  Grammy thought the miserable critters were back but we reassured her it probably came off the oregano.
Well, unfortunately for it, Grammy dispatched it toot sweet. 

It was number 3 critter this past week.  Spider 1 was a sneaky little critter that was hiding in the angle between bathroom and bedroom doorways. GONE in a flash!  

Then, Sweetie and Etude were entertaining another on the livingroom floor on Tuesday. It was more like hockey for cats with the spider as the puck.  Poor spider wasn't happy about it but hey... check out how Grammy feels about those in the blog in Poetry by Rondo and you'll know how he was handled - well, not handled.  More like footled!  

There was also a tentative 4th but that was Grammy having hallucinations in the shower.  She freaked and almost toppled out of the tub when she saw this huge black, long legged thing on her sponge holder.  I tell you... it was NOTHING but a reflection of the sponge's shadow in the clear plastic holder... but you'd have thought the old dear was being murdered.​  The woman is HIGH MAINTENANCE!

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​Boys, pack your backpacks and grab my carryon. Don't forget your passports. I've got the 'plastic'  yes, the red one! We're heading out for a few days, weeks, however long it takes for Grammy to get over whatever she has or arrives at destination unknown.​ 

*Dials Air Canada* "When is the next flight out to Christiansted?" *listens* "Hold the plane, we're 5 minutes away!  Wait for us!"   *conference call to BAMA and Muddy Waters* "Get ready we're diverting the jet to pick you all up!"

"Here we come, Aunty M!  Hope the pool is ready and you're stocked up on food and sodas!"

​Adieu Grammy!




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​Comments welcomed... especially when they are funny, silly or just plain goofy.

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